Maritza Ruiz-Kim

Artist, San Francisco Bay Area

Dead Dead Dead

My computer is Dead.

I am at my mom’s house, using her laptop. Have to admit, I am reading more since i have no computer!

Reading things like Billy Collin’s Sailing Alone Around the Room (I think that’s what it’s called.) I can think of a friend who would love the first poem about a barking dog even though her nemesis the neighborhood barking dog was recently put to sleep.

I have also read Lady Windemere’s Fan by Oscar Wilde. Hilarious! And so is Billy Collin’s poetry. And I am reading Mere Christianity by -CS Lewis? right?- and it’s so intelligent and perceptive about the nature of humans. And I finished reading a book about concrete poems today- not poems about concrete, but poems about words that are arranged and typographed (is that a word?) to be a poem. Okay, so it’s a children’s book, but still, it’s a book, and I felt like adding that to my well-read list here of the past couple days without a laptop.

I have been to several thrift stores looking for treasure, and though I have not found any, I will continue my quest.

I have been to the library twice, and I am collecting DVDs to educate myself visually on my upcoming trip to Europe- specifically Sweden and either Prague, or Dubrovnik, or….

So I am reading poetry, and maybe some day I will actually not just write and create art regularly, but my work will get known and appreciated, and it will have a life outside of me & my (dead) laptop, and I will once again feel that assurance that I was right when I was 14 and thought I’d grow up to be an artist of some kind. I like the Me that I am, and it’s all good really, I love my life (despite how hard it is to be a parent.) Yes I love my life, it’s just I feel in my gut that I have a lot to say and well, somehow, I can paint it or write it or say it or Something, to Someone, and so be that Somebody I knew all along I was, you know?

One Reply to “Dead Dead Dead”

  • I do know what you mean. I feel the same way, yet the difference between you and me is that you are actually articulate and artistically talented. I think someday you will be known because you will relate through your art and make a strong connection.

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